Is it possible to order lattes in jail?

There’s been an acrimonious debate going on in Ottawa about Bill C-51, Stephen Harper’s so-called Anti-Terrorism Bill, which looks the tiniest bit like an Anti-Environmentalism Bill. Also Anti-Democracy, Anti-Transparency, and Anti-Accountability ….. but perhaps I am being picky.

Coincidentally — or not — there was a disturbing story in The Globe And Mail recently about the RCMP investigating anti-petroleum organizations.

I know it’s only a matter of time before I am preventatively arrested, so I have prepared a letter of confession. I don’t write well under pressure, and I would hate to be thought inarticulate.

Dear CSIS:

To make your job easier, I am turning myself in.

I belong to a number of environmental organizations, at least 2 of which are blatantly anti-petroleum. I have attached their names, as well as a list of the petitions I have signed and my borrowing record from the library for the past 10 years.

I have also written several humorous articles criticizing Mr. Harper and the petroleum industry, which I will be posting on my blog. Please see Appendix A.

To date I have not committed any acts of civil disobedience. But I am contemplating several, so it might save time if you just arrest me now. I may not come quietly; I rarely do.

But once incarcerated, I will be very little trouble as most of my friends will be in jail too. We will probably form a book club and teach people how to knit.

You will find my contact information below. Have a nice day.

Sincerely,
Susan Hamilton

PS I took an elective in Comparative Religion as an undergraduate at UBC in 1968. You might want to look into that too.

PPS Is it possible to order lattes in jail? SH